Thursday, May 5, 2016


Thursday, May 5, 2016 0
Many times have you asked why did I keep silent when I knew. Why didn't I say something. It took me a lot amount of courage to talk to you. I didn't dare to look at your face the first time we had a conversation. I got nervous everytime I saw you. I was so worried how would I do during our first oncall together, because I wasn't being myself when you were around. I tried to avoid eye contact, pretending to ignore you to give you the idea that I wasn't into you when in fact, I was constantly staring at you when you were not looking. I didn't plan on telling you at all because I fear of being rejected by someone that I like so much. Turned out I was right. You broke my heart so bad when you told me you were with someone. I suffered a great deal amount of pain following that. Yet I still blame it all on myself. I did this to myself. I brought this misery to myself. You didn't know. I knew better, but I was too carefree. I made myself love you so much that when the reality knocked, my whole world shattered. I love you so much that I didn't dare to put this on you, because I know you didn't know better. It was all me. I believe in many great things. I believe that love isn't equal to being possesive. I believe that love is to make the person you love happy even if it means that you have to stay away. I believe that if I try harder, I might be able to get over you. I believe that sometime in the future, I might be able to look at you as a good friend, not more. I believe in many great things. And as good friend, I'm willing to do anything just to make sure you're happy. Because I can't live if you're not happy. To love someone from afar, I suppose not many can do that but I believe that I can. If anything, I would say thank you. Thank you for giving me this great experience; to feel this strong about someone.
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